Senseless Throwback Series

Originally Posted: April 25th, 2008

Whenever I visit websites, a common question that people ask are, “How do I tell if a girl is a lesbian?”. Here are some answers that I’ve came across and my answers to those answers.:)

“Give eye contact when speaking to them and check if they stare at you afterwards.”
Yes, but they could be straight and staring at you, wondering if you’re a lesbian and checking them out. The, “I’m straight, stop checking me out!” look.

“Watch what they eat. If they order a veggie burger and have short hair, they’re usually lesbian.”
No, jackass. Their stomach could be sore, they could be on a diet or they’re a vegetarian. And as far as the short hair goes, maybe they don’t like hair in their eyes or they don’t have time to brush it every single day. Either that or they’re too broke to buy shampoo and conditioner. :shrug:

“Tell them you’re gay and see what they say.”
I kind of agree with this one. If they ask questions and what not, they’re usually gay. If they’re reaction is just a simple “Oh”, they’re usually not.

“Flirt with them and see what they do.”
This is a good one. This is like asking them without actually asking them. If they laugh, smile and get touchy feely, they’ll probably swing your way.

“All the lesbians I know where masculine clothing so just look out for that.”
Masculine as in comfortable? I LOVE wearing sweats or loose fitting clothes. That’s just because it’s comfortable though.

“Check their MySpace and see their Orientation.”
Good idea. Also, check their Headline. If there’s a little photo of a bunch of words talking about how they want a guy that can treat them right, they probably couldn’t find one about a girl with the same words.;)

“See how her knowledge of The L Word is.”
If she doesn’t get Showtime and goes out of her way to look for it on the internet each week, she’s gay. If she owns a DVD of the show, she’s gay. If she can tell you what happened on any of the episodes, she’s gay. If she can name the actresses, she’s gay. If she thinks Shane is hot, she’s so fucking gay.

My absolute favourite answer, chosen by readers all around the world:
“Ask them. If they say they’re gay or bi, they probably are.”

If you decide to ask someone if they’re gay and they get offended and “go off”, they’re gay. They’re the ones that aren’t ready to come out yet.

And remember, all girls are lesbian to some extent. Some might be 1% and some 100%. None are 0%. It’s science. You can’t argue with science, can you?

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