Senseless Throwback Series

Originally Posted: July 22nd, 2008

…Or is it more? I think about you throughout the day. I think about touching you, but I’m not hurt that I don’t get to. I’d like there to be some sort of reciprocation, but I won’t get hurt if there is none. I get this unsettling shyness feeling when you’re around. Maybe it’s infatuation? You make me want to better myself. You’re so amazing in my eyes. I want to be the best me for you. I want to tell you how I feel but I rather not have to see the repulsed expression on your face.

“Little things” are noticed and endlessly analyzed for meaning. Everything you do seems to be an act of reciprocation. These things could be normal for you though, and I may be building it up in my head. I see some qualities in you that you could do without, but I somehow find good reasons for you to have these qualities. Crystallization perhaps?

You are one of the most beautiful people I have come across in my life, inside and out, but a sexual relationship is not needed, nor is it what I’m after. I just like how you make my heart palpitate. Though this is an unrequited limerence, so I’m trying to let go of you. I hope to eventually get bored and tired of thinking about you. Not that I don’t like it, but I know I can never be to you what you are to me. So I need to start seeing you as “just another girl”, though you will never be “just another girl” to me.